Croikey it's been a bit o time.   O well.   I am updating now because it's been so long.  I just went through a pretty horrible week to learn one simple lesson.  I didn't have to learn it this way but I chose to.  I was getting tired and I really wasn't feeling the drive to seek His Holy Face.  So for about a week and a half I just waited and fell into my addictive patterns.  You know those things you do to find fulfillment when God isn't the one filling you?? Well, I did that for abut a week and a half.  No suprise that I couldn't hear HIm so clearly.  Well this is spiritual emphasis week here at Nyack and I went to chapel last night.  I wanted to worship, but I didn't at the same time.  I knew that if I entered in to worship Him I was going to start feeling good.  And I was WELL aware that I had been spitting in His face all week and a bit beyond.  So I felt bad entering into worship knowing I was going to benefit from it when I wanted to feel bad at the same time for disobeying HIm.  IT'S LIKE GETTING STUCK!  CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT KIND OF GRACE???   You do something horrible for more than a week and all He wants to do is give you good gifts.....WHY!?!?  It's too amazing that kind of mercy and grace.  Lo and behold the pastor got up after worship and these were his (and His) words:  When you're waiting on the Lord you don't do nothing.   That a righteous God for you....and lo and behold I was able to hear His voice quite immediately...He gave me words for other people the moment I was open to listen and be humble.  GO FIGURE! (But only after you go and Worship, because you won't figure otehrwise.

CIAO!

Hey, it's been about 5 days since I've updated for thosewho check up on my entries.  I really want everybody to be encouraged.  the Lord is faithful to pour Himself out for us and to help us walk in his path.  I had a really good day today.  Chapel yesterday was interesting, and the guy who spoke was very forward about his message.  It bit me a little.  In many ways the biting was appropriate and in other ways the biting was offensive in a way that I don't think was the Holy Spirit.  But for the most part the message was convicting in a healthy way.  it dealt with problems of race.  It made me realize the racial spirits and curses that I carry.  However, I felt a bit condemned as a white person AS WELL AS convicted.  There were some words which were hurtful more than they were convicting.  but the spirit of his message was good.  So today I lay down in my room and I prayed to the Holy Spirit asking Him to forgive me for my racial sins, and forgiving the people who helped to put those racial curses on my life.  Also breaking generational curses (Come to think of it i have to deal with soul ties as well....Some very racist thought entered my mind today and as much as I dealt with these other problems I realize that breaking soul ties to the people who influenced me with these spirits is essential to thinking and feeling lovingly towards people of other races.  Unhealthy soul ties influence us all.)

I also had to ask for forgiveness and forgive somone who I held bitterness towards....because that had influence as well.   But as these things are broken off of my life more and more freedom comes.  He who is forgiven much loves much.

So after all that I hope you are blessed and convictedtowards freedom and deliverance so you can love other people as well as yourselff just that much more.

In Christ Jesus amazing and eternally bountiful love,

Joe

P.S.  sorry about the site being just a gigantic blue picture> I had done something that only shows up on a premium site, but I don't have premium.  They gave me a "20ish day trial" and it switched to the skin I had entered into the HTML box but hadn't deleted so all the other informatuion wasn't showing up.  Sorry!

Hey, I'm back from vacation!  Back to school moved into the dorm.  Let's see what God has for this semester.  This is home (not that Massachusetts ins't home, but this is home) and I can't wait to get closer to the Lord God.  I had about a 9 hour commute today.  I took a bus from Greenfild to the POrt authoirty and then on to Nyack.  I'm not listening to music now, but I was listening to the same thing as the las tpost.  I g2g!

Currently Playing Revived By World Wide Message Tribe 9. The Cross see related

I am sitting here, eating a bowl of ramen and the Presence is here.  I love it.  It's wonderful that as you grow closer to Jesus you begin to understand the Presence.  This is one of the many rooms of the Father's house, and by His blessing this room seems to be powerfully connected to other rooms.  The Presence is a wonderful thing to learn about because it comes in so many different forms, and it's different for everyone. 

Here's the thing: I am in a place where I am learning to enter it occasionally....and that means JUST entering it.  the Presence goes furthur.   Many people are learning to walk in the presence daily and CARRY an atmosphere of the Presence with them, so the Presence doesn't remain internal, but they LITERALLY have rivers of life flowing OUT of them.  Why do you think so many people were healed when Paul or Peter prayed for them, and layed hands on them.  Not only so, but the atmosphere of The Presence was SO strong that if people even come into contact with Peter's SHADOW or touched CLOTHS worn by Paul they would be heled of sickness.   It became a lasting substance...wow would I like to get there someday.

BREATHE the Presence.  I want MORE Jesus!  COME FATHER COME! AND BE GLORIFIED BY EVERY PART OF YOU BRIDE!

I can't believe I keep writing in this thing so much.  I'ts been three days.  I spent some time reading Exodus today.  It's amazing to read this stuff.  There is so much to learn through the old testament.

I was having issues earlier.  I was writing in the vteens forums and there was a VERY conservative individual condemning me as a heretic for being Charismatic...  It's hard to be loving sometimes.  i didn't do the greatest job either.  In any case I honestly believe that the divisions in the church are coming down.  It's will be amazing to see denominations break apart and flow together as one universal church.  I can guarantee that there are no denominations that have "the right way."  Any denomination that thinks thier theology is airtight and that they are the only way to fly...   they're arrogant.  I getr really angry at arrogant people.  it's one of those things that God needs to work on me with.  I am thrilled though, because I find that I am learning to TRULY rest in The Presence of Jesus and recieve his grace.  When I keep wallowing and thinking about my sin....I get NOWHERE.  It's like He doesn't want us to feel bad about it, because it just hurts us to sit there and think negative things about what we've done.  He would rather us be free and have hope.  He would rather that, after we sin, the very next second He would rather us just pick up, repent and forget about it and keep walking towards Him.  Amazing.  I was supposed to give my brother a bath but my mom just now took care of it. 

My sister just now got back from her retreat in New Hampshire.  She had some interesting fun with some twins she's telling me.  They apparently stalked her,  She and her friends came up with code names for the two of them.  Sounds like fun.  I never really wanted to go to the youth group retreats.....so I didn't, lol. 

I'm sure this post is long enough (and I don't think anyone reads these yet soooo....lol.

Peace.